Why is respect more important than love in a relationship? A question that finds its answers only through the flitting pages of time. The transient emotions of love will change like the seasons while respect will give you the home to enjoy, celebrate, recover, sustain and shelter you through the vagaries of the nature of love. You will find the survivors nodding their heads with the authority and acceptance of a conformist. Love is like the first flower in spring, the first splash of water in summer, the smell of wet soil in rain, the hue of red and gold in fall, and blanket of snow in winter. All of them bring with them the thrill of something new, spectacular, plans and expectations of living up the season and then as days pass into a routine, one misses what has gone by or awaits the next with the same eagerness as was for this season. Respect is like your home, it is there with you no matter what the season is.
Why is it that after the initial flush of love, wanting to be the best for each other, suddenly fingers are pointed at each other blaming that he/she has changed. Have they really? Or is it just your outlook towards them that has. Unfortunately we see life through a concave glass , micro-focusing on faults instead of blossoming under the convexity of diverseness. We expect the other to follow, toe the line, agree, indulge, accept, appreciate every little thing we do or say. Do we give the same in return? Isn’t it ridiculous that we want a clone of ourselves and yet that same person should to be able to complete our inadequacies. Are the two even possible together? Why do we judge another from where we stand? When we respect another for what she/he is, we give ourselves the opportunity to see life in a diverse spectrum, understand another point of view, weigh life differently. Sometimes we learn to better ourselves, sometimes we are equipped to deal with a situation to our advantage after standing in the other’s shoes. Life together should be a conglomeration of moments, different as they might be, converging to appreciate, to accept the differences, learn, enjoy and grow together.
Then there are the gypsies, self-proclaimed mavericks will throw caution to the winds, take on challenges, probably weather the storm but not without facing the consequences. Like a cracked mirror, a broken plate, a dented car….there will be tales, probably intriguing, maybe heart rending, but they will be the ones that survived…. Not lived. Life is not about I, me, myself. What are life’s highs and lows if they can’t be shared? What fun is it to win an award and not have someone special clapping for you in the wings with a tear in their eye? Or that shoulder to cry on when you are out broke, when you can be cradled in their arms with a smile knowing that their hugs are free.
Respect is acceptance, just an honest acknowledgement of another human being, with a separate brain, different bodily features and functions, and variant strength, stamina and ability. Respect will allow us to open our eyes to a convex prism of the world, see the beauty beyond the faults.